SHARPEN YOUR PENCILS!
Using nothing more than your cunning, wit, and marvelous skills, rewrite this piece with your best work. If you want to, tell us why you think it’s weak and how your efforts make it stronger. Change tense, voice, style, or whatever you think makes it better!
Use “Leave a Reply” for your rewrite.
Here’s the beautiful part… These pieces are randomly selected from member submissions, but the replies (corrections) all go on this single page. Figuring out what passage your magnificent ‘correction’ is for, is more than half the fun 🙂
So without further adieu, your piece to correct!
A blade cuts even and deep across his throat. The liquor, mixing with his blood, surges from the gaping cavern of his opened neck. In the moment before he fades into death, he relives his entire life. It wasn’t all bad, but there’s nobody that will care.